Where the River Flows Read online

  His heart would soon follow if he gave his body control. No, it was for the best to keep his distance as much as possible. If only his sister had kept her nose out of his life. A wife was a complication he did not need. Never wanted to face the fear of losing another woman. It was not farfetched for Viola to die in the same manner as Gretchen, during childbirth. At the thought, he fortified himself. It was a chance he'd never take again.

  The puppy jumped up and settled on his chest as his heavy eyelids fell shut.

  *****

  Swishing sounds permeated through the haze of sleep. Moments later, the smell of coffee woke him further. Who made coffee? Did his sister creep in without waking him?

  He opened his eyes and looked around the still dark room. It was early, the sun not out yet. Still on the chair in the front room, he peered toward the kitchen. Through the open space, he caught sight of the edge of yellow skirts just as they moved out of his sight. Oh right, his new wife. He was married again.

  "How about you and I eat breakfast little one," she spoke to the puppy who's tail thumped onto the wooden flooring.

  Through half closed eyes, he watched Viola move to the table to place a cup upon it, followed by a bowl on the floor for the dog. She pulled a chair back and sat down with what looked to be a piece of bread.

  After taking a sip of the coffee, she let out a sigh and looked straight ahead as if in deep thought. Seeming to feel his gaze upon her, she turned to look at him. Their gazes caught and for a brief instant her eyes widened.

  Joshua sat up and nodded at her. "Good morning."

  It was a long moment before she replied. "Is it? You didn't look comfortable sleeping there."

  Her reply took him by surprise. The woman did not mince words, reminded him of Abigail. "I sleep here from time to time."

  She motioned to the table. "Would you like coffee and some bread? Since you didn't show me about the place, I don't know if you have a hen house. There isn't much in the larder."

  He stood and stretched only to grimace when his broken arm protested. "I had a lot to do. We can walk about today, once the sun rises."

  Without a word, she got up and set a cup and plate before an empty chair. From the corner of his eyes, he caught her sizing him up. Dirty and smelly, it was awkward to sit at the table with her. She coughed and pressed her lips together. "I can have a bath ready for you later this morning if you wish."

  No way was he undressing in the same space with her. Admittedly, he had to wash up, he stunk, but it didn't mean she could get any ideas. "It won't be necessary. I'll go to the river and wash up. It should be warm enough today."

  Her stiff nod spoke of not believing him. "When are we going to town? We are in dire need of sundries."

  "Tomorrow. A buyer is coming today for the horses." He scratched at his beard. "Why did you sleep in the guest room?" Immediately he wished to take the words back and bite his tongue off.

  "You didn't place the ad did you?" Her question caught him off guard sending him to choke and cough when the coffee went down the wrong way.

  She studied him seeming to be unfazed. "I am willing to bet Sunshine and Abigail decided it was time for you to get married again."

  "I'm not sure what made them decide to do it. You're right, I didn't. However I take full responsibility for it and will keep my vows to you."

  "Is that why you ensured not to be here to consummate the marriage?" She cocked her head to the side, her raised brows made him shift uncomfortably. "If we're to be married under the eyes of God, we have to. As much as it may displease us both."

  His mouth fell open at her deciding sleeping with him would be unpleasant. "You don't want to?"

  "Of course not. You smell, are in dire need of a shave and haircut and from what I gather, are an overall dirty person." She glanced around the room. "If I had a choice I would keep from sleeping with you. Once however should not be too dreadful."

  Unsure of what to say, he cleared his throat and pressed his lips together. Finally he could not hold it back. He laughed and continued to do so until his sides ached. "Well I'll be if you're not a direct person." He attempted to get his breath. "I do apologize for the state of the house. Earlier this week, my sister came to help me clean up and I was in a bad mood. Threw her out."

  Viola narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips. "You are a strange man, Mr. McKade."

  "I thought we'd decided on given names," Joshua finally stopped chuckling, yet he couldn't help chiding her. "Call me Joshua, Viola."

  Viola got to her feet and picked up her cup and plate. "You should take the dog out with you. If she is to be a ranch dog, she must learn to be around the other animals."

  The puppy looked up with expectation seeming to understand they discussed her. Joshua scratched his beard. "No, she's too young still. Once she's a bit bigger then I'll bring her along. I want her to stay around the house. Don't want a wolf or some wild cat getting her."

  "Very well," Viola replied getting his plate. "What is her name?"

  Damn. Joshua was sure she'd disapprove of his not naming the dog yet. He looked around the room searching for inspiration. The puppy scratched at his leg and he bent to scratch her behind the ears. "I'm waiting for it to come clear."

  "You have a dog with no name?" Viola placed her balled hands on her hips. "Amazing." The word was not said with admiration. It dripped with disdain.

  "Grace," Joshua replied. "Her name is Grace."

  "Ugh," Viola walked to the door. "Come on, Grace." Both females left him alone to ponder what he'd said wrong this time.

  He went to a wall and looked at a handmade calendar. Two more weeks and he'd be able to take the splint off his arm. He contemplated removing it, but then decided it too provided a barrier to any relations with Viola. The injury had become a blessing in disguise. With a smile on his face, he went to the back room to retrieve clean clothes and his soap and drying cloths. A bath in the river would be good. Somehow he'd have to figure how to keep the bandaging from getting wet.

  The more he thought about it, the better he felt at his new wife's presence. It meant a neat house, help with the farm animals, good meals, and even someone to talk to in the evening. Once she recognized there was no need for relations, things would be good.

  When he walked past the guest bedroom, a stark white nightgown lay across the bed. The lace trimmed piece of clothing looked soft to the touch. A light floral scent emanated to the doorway and he took a step away. "Women and their potions," he mumbled and stalked to the door.

  Chapter Eight

  Viola stood next to a fence and watched little Grace running in circles chasing a butterfly. It was a beautiful day in Colter Valley. Spring was in full swing, the lush colors of wild flowers across the field made her smile. She'd never seen such stunning open spaces before. Just as she turned to go inside, Joshua came out. Bundle under his arm, he didn't see her, kept his attention straight ahead. Once he made his way down the porch steps, he headed away from her to where she assumed was the river's edge. The puppy caught sight of him and raced behind.

  The kitchen would be her first target, and then she'd clean up the front room. If his sister and Sunshine came for a visit and found the house in it's current state, it would mortify her.

  Hopefully by the time they did visit, they'd have the business of consummating the marriage done. If he refused, then she'd ask them to take her back to town. Surely in a place where he had to place an ad, she could find a more suitable husband. The judge could annul the marriage and she'd ask to work with Sunshine and help bake cakes until she found another husband. Or she could write her new friend Mabel, who'd promised to come for her.

  As far as she knew no one in town knew about her yet, so perhaps it would be easy to start anew. And this time she'd have the advantage of getting to know a gentleman first.

  Several hours later, she sat down to a cup of coffee on the porch. Her arms were sore and hands raw from cleaning and scrubbing. The kitchen gleamed and she'd yet to start cleaning
the front room. The floors had been swept and scrubbed with soap and she'd washed the dingy kitchen curtain, which now flapped in the wind.

  Although the larder was almost empty, there were beans and some dried beef, so she had them cooking. Along with some left over bread from the basket, it would make a suitable dinner meal.

  She looked to a small hen house and picked up a basket from the porch floor. "Let's see what we've got." Before long she returned with enough eggs for breakfast and several more she could come up with some sort of meal if Joshua decided not to go to town for sundries the following day.

  Four men who'd arrived earlier stood outside the stable speaking with Joshua. He motioned to the corral and two men went inside. They seemed to have come to an agreement and soon the men were riding off with several horses.

  Viola pushed her hair away from her face and stood in front of the house attempting to make out the men's features. If they were local, perhaps one of them would be good husband material.

  After the men left, she turned to go back inside, only to stop when Joshua called to her. He sauntered more than walked, his movements graceful and self-assured. Even with his right arm in a sling, his figure was easy on the eyes. She wondered what he'd look like without the beard. Perhaps he was handsome without all the distracting facial hair.

  Not that it mattered in the least. If he refused to lay with her, they would not remain married. She was already not happy about spending another night there without being proper husband and wife.

  Finally he reached her and she ensured to keep her eyes to his. "You wanted me to show you around. How about we walk a bit before supper?"

  "Very well," she nodded and strolled beside him. "I found the chicken house and gathered eggs."

  "Good. Then we'll skip it." They went to the large stables, which were for the most part empty. "I bring the horses in here at night. Not all of them, just the smaller ones or those standing nearby watching me 'cause they're cold." He approached a stall and she saw it was occupied. "This mare is close to giving birth. Kind of late in the season for it however I think the foal will be fine with the warmer weather and all."

  He moved across to the other side and showed her another set of pens. "This is where I bring the cows in the winter." They went from the stable to the smaller house beside it. He didn't show her in, instead just stood out front. "Bunkhouse. For when there's farmhands working. No one is working now. Once the fields are ready for harvesting, I'll hire four or five men."

  They walked to a small garden beside the house. Several apple trees flanked the overgrown spot. Joshua reached up and plucked one. "Try it." He handed her the apple. "I grow all sorts of things here. Haven't done much since I broke my arm."

  She noted the garden was in dire need of care. "I'll take care of the gardening. If I stay."

  His gaze flew to her face. "What do you mean? Of course you'll stay. We're married. Why wouldn't you remain?"

  Once again the same subject to discuss. "If we are not proper husband and wife I cannot remain. It would be wrong. I already don't feel right about last night."

  "I don't see how it has anything to do with being married," his brows furrowed. "We are husband and wife, we said the vows."

  She crossed her arms, the apple in one hand. "If what you say is true, why can marriages be annulled if they are not consummated?"

  Of course he didn't have a reply for it.

  Viola let out a breath. "I always heard it was the woman who tried to avoid relations. Is there something physically wrong? If you are not able, please tell me."

  His face, the part she could see anyway reddened. "I am perfectly able. I have a broken arm, which would make it hard to do."

  "Joshua McKade, I know how mating works and your arm has nothing to do with it. Tonight we will consummate the marriage or I will return to town and find another husband."

  She turned on her heel and headed around the house to the back door. The man was infuriating. If he had no plans to consummate the marriage, then he should not have pronounced the vows. Now she was left to find a husband or a job, which by the looks of how small Colter Valley was, would not be likely.

  An hour later, he came in after washing up. She placed a bowl of beans before him and bread. Then poured them each a cup of coffee.

  "If you can make simple beans taste this good, I am imagining you are an excellent cook." He continued eating not looking up at her.

  "Thank you. We do need sundries."

  "We can get up early and go to town." Once again he did not meet her gaze.

  Viola didn't push for any answers, she'd know soon enough if she would stay in town or return with him.

  After dinner, he went to sit on the porch with the pup and she cleaned up. She was shocked when he'd put his plate and cup by the washbasin and asked if she needed help with cleaning up. She'd sent him to rest after recovering from being surprised at his words.

  *****

  When she went to the larger bedroom, the fire in the hearth was lit. The room was warm and comfortable. It would be easy to fall into a deep sleep, Viola thought looking at the large bed with its thick quilts. Her nerves were fraught with anxiousness at what lay ahead. As much as she insisted on the consummation, it didn't mean she was comfortable with the idea.

  She washed up after undressing and donned her nightdress. Then she brushed out her hair and sat on the bed. Any sleepiness she may have had disappeared when Joshua entered the room. He cleared his throat and went to the hearth. After putting another log into the fire, he folded a blanket on the floor in front of it and patted it. Grace went to it and lay on it. She curled into a ball almost immediately, not moving.

  Viola shifted and slid under the blankets, her steady gaze on him curious to see what he'd do.

  "Is it warm enough?" He asked not seeming a bit uncomfortable.

  "Yes." All she could do was stare at him now because he bent to remove his boots. His shirt was already open. By the dampness of his hair, he'd washed up before coming to the bedroom. He pulled the shoulder strap off ensuring to hold his arm in place, then removed his shirt. As she'd suspected, he had a very attractive body. Wide, well-formed chest and muscular arms. There was a feathering of hair across his chest that came to a downward point then trailed down the center to his stomach.

  Before long, his britches were done away with as well. In his underpants, he came to the bed and climbed in next to her.

  He turned to her. "If you could pull your nightshift up, I will pull my underpants down and we can do this."

  "Oh? Of course. What about your arm?" Viola knew the mechanics of what happened between a man and a woman, yet this felt cold and unnatural.

  Joshua pressed his lips together in thought. "I'll work around it. I think it's best if you are prepared, it being your first time and all."

  "Ready? What do you mean?"

  He lay on his right side facing her and with his left hand reached for her shoulder. "Close your eyes for a moment." He watched her face until she did as told. Her heart began to beat hard. When he touched her breast, she jumped at the startling and intrusive gesture.

  She wasn't sure what happened next, whatever he did sent her to another place. He touched and caressed her until she was beyond herself with heat and pleasure. When he came over her, she readily accepted him into her body and although there was a sharp pain of tearing, it was soon gone.

  His warm breath fanned over her as he moved, each movement taking her to a higher place until all she could do was cling to him and cry out.

  In the fogginess of her decent he rolled off of her, his body convulsing next to hers. He let out a deep groan and finally stilled.

  She lay in the room watching the flames' shadows dance on the ceiling unable to keep the tightness in her chest from becoming overwhelming. As beautiful as the last moments had been, the stark reality was the consummation, to her husband it had been a duty. He'd not kissed her and now lay with his back to her.

  A tear slid from the corner of he
r eye and plopped onto the pillow. She pulled her nightgown down and the blankets up over herself.

  Never mind all her romantic notions and what she'd wished for out of the marriage. Perhaps in time they would be friends.

  For now, their arrangement would begin.

  Chapter Nine

  Joshua clung to the edge of the mattress to keep from rolling over to comfort Viola. The soft sniff tore at him. God it was her first time, she deserved to be held, comforted, and kissed. No woman should lay deserted after giving her virginity to her husband.

  In a way he felt the same way, as if he too had relations for the first time. It was the first time since Gretchen and he felt like he'd cheated. His arm throbbed in protest from him lying on it. And his conscious did not allow for him to remain distant from Viola.

  It took some maneuvering to get his underpants back up and finally once he did, he rolled to her. "Come here. Let me hold you. I promise not to hurt you."

  Viola snuggled against his side and laid her head on his shoulder and sniffed. "It didn't hurt."

  "Yes it did. I know it's not an easy thing for you to be away from friends and family. Do you have a family?"

  "A sister," she whispered. "She's all I have left."

  "Well now you have me and Abigail. I suppose Sunshine too."

  It was good to hear her soft chuckle.

  A few minutes later her breathing evened out and he slowly slipped from under her. She slept soundly while he could only lie next to her and wondered how he'd keep from touching her again. She was beautiful, and her body oh so enticing.

  *****

  "I'll go see about feeding the horses and then we'll head into town." Joshua pushed away from the breakfast table the next morning.

  Viola had remained quiet all through the meal, her mood subdued. "What about the puppy?"

  "We can bring her along," he looked to the pup who'd moved to the door with him and then to Viola who'd begun cleaning up the breakfast dishes and cups, her back to him.